Bodyguard Rescue Page 14

  Obviously misreading her facial expressions, he assured her, “You’ll be safe, Doc. I’ll keep watch.”

  She felt a blush of mortification rise in her face. But he’d already swung around to tend the fire, saving her from further embarrassment.

  “Strip down to your T-shirt and underwear. That way you will have the pants and hunting shirt to keep you warm when you’re finished.”

  Closing her eyes briefly, she prayed for control before she answered. Still, she couldn’t dismiss the picture of him watching her bathe.

  “All right.” She spoke the words softly, but her voice, raspy as dried leaves, gave her thoughts away.

  Roman glanced up. Thick tension swarmed between them, crackling like a live power line.

  Kate cleared her throat, hoping the action would relieve the terrible ache in her chest. It didn’t.

  “I’ll only be a second.” She needed air and space.

  Roman didn’t move, his body unnaturally still. She could feel his gaze follow her as she tossed the soap onto the pack and walked to the back of the tunnel to kick off her pants, shoes and bra, before going to the crevice to shower.

  “It might be better if you turn around, Cerberus.”

  “No, Doc. That wouldn’t be better at all.” She froze at the rough tone. “I’ll wait for you outside.”

  Damn the man. When he said things like that, it sent her desire into full tilt. Her hands shook, forcing her to take several uneven breaths before reaching for her pants zipper. It was almost as if they were playing a game—except she didn’t know the rules.

  Frustration shot through her, causing her to jerk the zipper. A cry escaped her lips as the metal teeth caught the tip of her finger. Damn! Damn! Damn! She shook her hand and spun around in a full circle. Stomping her foot when the pain didn’t subside.

  “What the hell happened?” Suddenly Roman was there, trying to grab the hand. She jerked it away.

  “Don’t touch me!” Fury welled up in her, then gushed from every pore. “Don’t touch me again unless you mean it.”

  Roman scowled. “Is that statement supposed to make sense to me?” He made another grab for her hand, but she slapped him away.

  “Damn it. You’re bleeding.”

  “I don’t care.” In deference to her statement, she sucked on the finger, almost gagging at the metallic taste of blood.

  Roman planted his hands on his hips and lifted his eyes to the ceiling. “I’m not even going to ask what this is about.” Then his head dropped with an exasperated sigh. “But if you’re finished, I suggest you take that cold shower.”

  His words fed her already-seething temper. She wasn’t finished yet, not nearly. “Go to hell.” She turned her back and yanked the pants off, kicking them across the ground for good measure. The action didn’t soothe the fury, only inflamed it. She swung around. “Better yet, run away before I change the game rules.” Reaching under her shirt, she unsnapped her bra before tugging the straps out her sleeves.

  “Now what are you talking about?” His eyes narrowed, but she didn’t care. She threw the bra onto the ground and got in his face.

  “I’m talking about how you seduced me, lied to me and left me.” She jabbed her hurt finger into his chest. “But most of all you made me love you. I hated you for that.” The tears she hadn’t realized she’d been holding in check ran.

  The events of the past few days had left her too tired to control her emotions. Annoyed, she dashed the tears away. “You want to know why I had a condom in my purse?” She folded her arms tightly across her chest. “I carried that damn condom around for months because of you. I thought you’d come back and sweep me into your arms, then beg for my forgiveness.” A bitter laugh escaped her. “God, I was so naive.”

  She waited for a response, but Roman’s face was set in cement. The lack of emotion didn’t surprise her.

  “Eventually, I smartened up and realized you weren’t coming back. That you probably found someone else.” Amanda. Her chin shot out. “I decided to use that condom for a one-night stand. To prove to myself I was still desirable.”

  A violent stream of Italian curses followed her words. She smiled derisively, only to have it drop away with his next comment.

  “Of all the—”

  “Don’t say it.” She snapped back, putting her fist up. “Don’t you dare call me stupid.” Grudgingly she added, “I couldn’t do it, anyway, but even if I did, you would have no right to be upset about my actions.”

  He let out a disgusted sigh. “I can’t believe you even considered it.”

  “You can’t believe—” Dumbfounded by his self-righteous disappointment, she sputtered for the right words. “God, you…are…unbelievable. You leave me because you decide you don’t want me, but the fact I might sleep with someone else makes you angry.”

  Suddenly the fight went out of Kate, and she let her fist drop to her side. “You not only broke my heart, you hurt my pride. One of the few things that gave me strength.”

  Cool fingertips slid under her chin, raising her head until her gaze met his. The tenderness reflected in the brown depths became blurry as tears flooded her eyes. She blinked them away.

  With a gentle hand Roman cupped her cheek, his thumb skimming over the wetness. “If you’d decided against a one-night stand, why was the condom still in your purse?”

  She closed her eyes against the love that welled up at the simple touch. She knew he expected her to resist answering, but instead she turned her face into his palm. “As a reminder never to put my heart at risk again.”

  But she had, despite her desperate fight not to. And she had risked it on the man who had shattered it the first time.

  She opened her eyes in time to see his jaw clench.

  “I guess I deserve that,” he responded.

  She shook her head. The pressure in her chest increased, forcing her to take a deep breath. It didn’t matter that he couldn’t love her. Not anymore. She loved him and that was enough. Slowly, she reached around his neck and buried her fingers in his hair, drawing his face to hers.

  “Doc,” Roman pleaded while his hand gripped her forearm to pull away.

  “Shhh,” she whispered, fear of refusal causing her to place her injured finger over his mouth. “I need you.” The pad rubbed his lips. “I need this.” Please, she silently pleaded.

  His lips moved lightly over the cut, sending shock waves down to her toes.

  Then she was kissing him, opening her mouth, allowing him full access to the depths that waited. Her tongue met his as their bodies swayed together, lingering as thigh touched thigh, chest brushed chest. Kate’s heart beat wildly, thundering in her ears.

  With a groan Roman broke away and buried his face in the soft folds of her hair. His body convulsed against hers as he struggled for control. Something she didn’t want. She tugged at his hair, wanting his mouth on hers again. This time he pulled her hand back, locking it between their bodies.

  “It’s not going to happen. I’m sorry.” His arms fell and he stepped away. “I don’t expect you to understand my decision, but I hope one day you’ll accept it.” He picked up the discarded Uzi. “I’m here to protect you, nothing more.”

  After he turned away, Kate slumped to her knees. Partly from disbelief, mostly from anger at herself. She only had herself to blame. She’d taken the risk and lost.

  He walked to the entrance, his body rigid, his demeanor once again that of Cerberus. Kate clenched her hands in her lap to help fight her frustration. Why couldn’t he be both lover and protector?

  Kate blinked, stunned at the thought. Her mind raced back over the past few days. Every time they moved emotionally closer, he drew back behind the wall of protector. Roman’s sense of right would allow nothing less.

  A faint smile curved her lips and she whispered, “Ah, Kate, you used to be such a clever girl.”

  “We don’t have all day, Doc.”

  The impatient order snapped her to her feet while a thought heaved against her
heart. But we have all night and it might be our last. More determined than ever she grabbed the soap and headed toward the crevice.

  THE POSSIBILITY OF TORTURE had never concerned Roman. When he’d become an operative, he’d known the risks involved. He’d been taught by the best and understood that at any given time, the enemy could capture him. But not once through his training did any of his superiors mention the purest form of torture would be observing Dr. Katherine MacAlister take a bath under a mountain waterfall in a downpour.

  Nerves tense, he had watched her step under the torrent of water falling from the mountain crevice, grateful she’d meant to keep the T-shirt on. The less enticement the better, he had thought, turning to eye the leaden sky.

  “Hurry up, Doc.” He had swung back around to give the warning and felt the full impact of his mistake. Soap bar in hand, she had just reached underneath the shirt to scrub her body.

  She stopped, hand hovering over her stomach, the wet underwear doing little to conceal her from his gaze. “I’ll just be a few more minutes.” The words came out hesitant and husky as she moved the soap in languid circles over her breasts and torso before sliding it down each limb with fanatical deliberation.

  His heart quickened, a high vibration strumming through his veins, matching the tension of the tempest overhead. A nerve in his cheek twitched, and he gripped the Uzi tighter before redirecting his gaze back to the terrain.

  The spattering drops soon turned to pelting rain soaking Roman. But the cold mountain storm did nothing to douse the heat building in Roman’s body. Clenching his jaw, he fought down his hormones.

  A muffled groan from behind snapped Roman back around before he realized it was the sound of pure satisfaction rather than of alarm.

  With her head thrown back, Kate washed her hair, using her hands to work through the glistening tresses. Unable to control the impulse, his gaze dropped to her shoulders then to her breasts, defined clearly as they pressed forward against the wet T-shirt. His groin tightened, growing into a full, heavy arousal.

  Then she rinsed.

  He watched with hooded eyes as she lifted her T-shirt and allowed the water to cascade over her body. The suds slid leisurely down the long length of her before dropping, almost unwillingly, to the ground.

  She took exactly thirteen minutes. And during those thirteen minutes, Roman lived in hell.

  Frustration edged his order to end it—which she did with a slight smile that lasted through dinner. A smile that set his teeth on edge and drove him to the opening of the tunnel for air.

  “Make love to me.”

  Roman’s nostrils flared at the softly spoken words.

  “Go to sleep, Doc.” He didn’t turn to her or step back into the tunnel. The storm served as a distraction to what waited for him by the fire. “I thought we settled this. Don’t do something you’ll regret later.”

  “The only thing I regret is that I didn’t try harder before.”

  He heard the rasp of her pants’ zipper, then the faint brush of cloth against skin. If he turned around, she’d be standing there in nothing but that damned hunting shirt and a wisp of lace. Roman swallowed audibly, feeling the hold on his control grow more tenuous with each moment.

  “It won’t change anything, Doc. I’m still the same guy who left you two years ago.”

  “You might be. But it doesn’t matter.”

  Roman’s eyes searched the night, almost hoping one of Threader’s men would make an appearance. Useless, he knew. The weather made it too dangerous for anyone to traverse the mountainside.

  Like a cornered animal he got mean.

  “Do you want me to use you and leave you like I did before? Because that’s what I’ll do.” Snarling, he swung around to face her. Unblinkingly she met his glare, her silver eyes clashed against his.

  “I’ll take my chances,” she said simply.

  Disbelieving the quiet determination in her voice, Roman grunted.

  She reached for the collar of her shirt. His heart jolted.

  “What the hell are you doing?”

  “I’m unbuttoning my shirt.”

  Damn. Desire slammed into his loins, almost bringing Roman to his knees. He tightened his jaw against the searing flash of heat. “Doc.” The plea slipped out of his mouth before he could stop it. He tried to recover. “Don’t be stupid, we have no protection.” Out of shear desperation, he threw out his last bluff. “If you get pregnant I’ll still leave you.”

  That stopped her. He could feel her hesitation. But it lasted only a few seconds before she laughed. The pure feline satisfaction in the tone caused Roman’s blood to thicken and his body to throb. He watched, spellbound, while she finished slipping the last button free. Slowly she allowed the material to slide over her shoulders.

  A hiss escaped from between his teeth.

  She draped the shirt down her arms, then let it drop to the floor. “I’m beginning to realize I’m tougher than I look.” Another laugh, this time deeper, more confident. “Maybe even tougher than you, Cerberus.”

  The truth of her words set off alarms in his head. Right now she was stronger. And he was growing weaker by the moment.

  The muted hues of the firelight surrounded her, gentling her features until she became an exotic creature of the night. The shadows danced across her body, camouflaging the bruises and casting her skin with a warm, golden glow.

  A cold sweat slicked his skin.

  She stepped closer.

  Desperate to do the right thing, he reached up and grabbed the entrance of the tunnel with both hands, white knuckling the wood beam. But the bite of the pine did nothing to soothe his urge to bury his hands in the thick, mass of hair that flowed over her shoulders and down her breasts. The dusky pink of her nipples peeked through the dark tresses, their crested peaks tempting him to taste.

  She turned away and he sucked air, grateful for the reprieve.

  “Damn it, Kate, I don’t want you.” If she walked away now, he’d pull through.

  The stiffening of her shoulders told him she’d heard. Against his will, his eyes sought her body, following the gentle arc of her hips, hanging for a brief second on the small indentation of her back.

  “You’re lying.” She frowned over her shoulder before hooking her thumbs on the minuscule strings of fabric that draped her hips. “But even that won’t stop me.” She snapped the bands against her hips and Roman felt the reverberations through his groin.

  “Are you watching?” She wiggled her bottom.

  Are you wanting? were the words he heard. A growl rumbled deep from inside him, like an untamed beast fighting for a morsel of food. He didn’t watch, he devoured. Unable to stop himself—not wanting to stop himself—his gaze locked on the soft roundness of her bottom as she bent over, slowly slipping the material down the slopes of her thighs. He flexed his hands against the beams, imagining the feel of the supple skin beneath his palm. The lace slid easily over the backs of her knees then down the slender arch of each calf. With a short flick of her ankle, Kate left the cloth lying on the ground.

  Gnashing his teeth, Roman fought the tightening of his muscles.

  She wasn’t finished.

  In the next millisecond she swung around to face him. Leisurely, she reached down and ran her hands back up her legs to her torso, pausing from time to time to tantalize.

  Roman swore, viciously. The battle raged within him. A battle he couldn’t win.

  “Do you like what you see Cerberus?” she whispered, the husky words unknowingly putting an end to the war. His fists came down from the ceiling to lay clenched against his sides. He shoved the guilt back into the recesses of his mind. Nothing was going to stop him. Not now.

  Then he closed the distance, his eyes narrowing on his prey. “You’ve got two seconds to say no before it’s too late.” Even as he gave the warning, Roman wasn’t sure he could afford two seconds.

  “Don’t you understand?” she murmured. “It’s already too late.” Her eyes, luminous in the fi
relight, filled with emotion. “I love you.”

  A jab of intense pleasure hit him. On its heels came extreme pain. He didn’t deserve her love or even want it. But the fact he had it, if only for tonight, humbled him. With a growl he yanked her to his chest and tangled his hands in her hair, relishing the silken texture against his fingertips. God, how had he gone so long without her? He tugged her head back and exposed the tender flesh of her neck. How had he gone so long without this? “I can’t love you back.” He rasped the words against her throat before licking the area underneath the slope of her jaw.

  “I know that, too,” she acknowledged, trying not to let the truth of the words hurt.

  She wound her arms around his neck and arched her body closer to his, suddenly the fear of him rejecting her again too much for her to bear. Then his body shuddered, swamping her with relief. This time he wasn’t going to turn her away. He wasn’t going to hide behind his duty.

  His hands cupped the slope of her backside and lifted, fitting her tightly against the length of his arousal. Heat swirled in her belly, sending liquid fire sweeping down her thighs as she wrapped her legs around his waist.

  “Cerberus.”

  Roman swung her around and pinned her against the wall. She nearly cried out from the hard lines of his body rippling against the soft contours of hers.

  His hand seared a path across her belly and dipped into the triangle of curls. He swallowed her gasp of sweet agony as his stroking fingers sent jolts of electricity through her body.

  Fully aroused, Kate matched his urgency with her own unsated needs. She tugged at his shirt, whipping the offensive barrier over his head, before returning to the kiss with reckless abandon. She rubbed her breasts against his chest, trying desperately to ease their throbbing ache against the rough hair.

  Roman released a tormented groan against her mouth and shifted her slightly down his hips, his muscles bunching under her hands with the effort. It was a heady invitation. Without breaking the contact of their lips, Kate reached down and unsnapped his pants. Passion pounded through her as she cupped his heavy arousal. The heat of his flesh was intoxicating. Freeing her mouth from his, she demanded, “Now, Cerberus.”